Deep Thoughts with Brett Favre

Look, I understand a lot of people’s frustration with my recent antics. Will I or won’t I, it gets old right? The fact of the matter is I don’t have too many NFL years left in these old bones and I don’t want to go to training camp. I feel I’ve earned that right. I know many people (this blogger included) grow weary of constant updates from ESPN regarding my every movement and thought. But is that not an indictment of ESPN as much as it is me? Now that the media circus can slow down for a while let me make the case for me, Brett Favre, in Minnesota.

1) Have you seen the current Minnesota Vikings QB depth chart? I mean not just glanced, but actually take it in for a while? Let us not forget in our outrage that you fully intended to waste Adrian Peterson with the Rosenfels-Jackson merry-go-round. (Let me take this moment to spread the word that “Rosenfels” is in fact going to be the new cuss word of choice… go ahead, yell it out, I’ll wait… You liked it didn’t you.) What… you were thinking you could maybe make a “Booty Call”? John David Booty is also not the answer. C’mon people, I lead the world in all-time TD’s, give me a chance.

2) Hey Vikings fans, please don’t disregard this- the greatest opportunity given to a fan base in the history of sports. Please don’t be the “I am no longer a Vikings fan” guy. That is foolish. You can take this opportunity to rub in your Packer-fan-friend that the most popular guy in their state, perhaps the most popular athlete in Wisconsin sports history has knowingly and willingly (that isn’t to say he may not be under a confundus charm- can I get a Harry Potter shout out!) come to their most hated rival and giving a royal middle finger to all of cheese land. When we beat them, we can laugh at their children that they’ve foolishly already named Brett, and further laugh at them for foolishly worshipping a man as fickle as I like a god.

3) And lastly, remember that sports are, at the very core, entertainment. I have made millions of dollars entertaining all of my fans. Not one person can say that my being on the Vikings won’t make the season more entertaining than another T-Jack snoozefest that slowly deflates the fanbase and team alike. That first Vikes/Pack game on MNF is going to have a Superbowl-like buzz of importance. The season, good or bad, is going to be incredibly entertaining, and I think all of the Vikings’ fans out there will see it my way when we are 3-0 and all is well- at that time all this hoopla and drama will be long gone and all will be forgiven.

Lord knows this blogger is exited